Oakwinter5k2

Item Number: SCP-5000

Object Class: Keter

Special Containment Procedures: The Cosmic Microwave Background's emissions are to be monitored for presence of SCP-5000 instances via use of SETI and likewise deep-space networks. In the case of a propagator of SCP-5000 transmissions being located, MTF Xi-63 "Luddites" is to explore the propagator via use of wormhole technology in accordance with the Gujar Protocol. Previous, and any future iterations of this document, are to be accessible to review the content of SCP-5000 instances themselves.

Description: SCP-5000 is a series of transmissions received from the Pelican Nebula from 6 different propagators, all proven to be spacecraft capable of interstellar travel. No propagator of SCP-5000 is currently active, suggesting SCP-5000 instances all were transmitted in the past; the significant distance between Earth and these propagators is the likely reason for the delay in transmission.

Enclosed below is a list of further documentation concerning SCP-5000, and the Gujar Protocol.


Assorted On-site Complaints Following Pulse


Complaint: Site-75's cafeteria juice blender failed.

Status Of Complaint: Blender repaired. Occasionally stops when carrots are placed into it.


Complaint: Site-21 navigation application directs users away from their destinations and directly into possibly life-threatening situations.

Status of Complaint: Unknown worm placed into application was the cause of the issue. The virus has since been removed.


Complaint: Cellular service at Site-13 weakened.

Status of Complaint: It was determined this was unrelated to SCP-5000, and was due to a pigeon striking the nearby cellular tower. The tower has since been repaired. The corpse of the pigeon has been recovered, and was found to contain recently implanted augmented parts.


Complaint: Social media opened on-site in all Foundation Provisional sites show recommendations for nearby restaurants, rather than topics or people that personnel like or follow.

Status of Complaint: Companies which this issue effects have been notified of the issue. Estimated time of repair is unknown.


Complaint: Site-31's on-site computers' search suggestions do not follow input in search bar. For example, typing in "how do i calculate 10 by 10" will result in suggestions including "how do i insert a man's intestine into a grinder," "how much wattage would burning a "single blade of grass" result in," and "mohs hardness scale." The same suggestions are made no matter the initial query.

Status of Complaint: Not repaired. The cause is still being determined.


Complaint: Spam filtering on official email addresses has stopped.

Status of Complaint: Repaired. An edit was made in order to delete a single semicolon, preventing spam filtration. The source of this edit is unknown. Following this repair, the volume of spam emails received by Foundation personnel increased by nearly 1250% on average.


Foundation Thaumaturgy Department Log
Researcher: Dr. Samantha Howard


<BEGIN LOG>

Date: 2025/9/29

Well, here we are. With almost all mechanical equipment employed by the Foundation out of operation for the time being, the O5s decided to turn to us here in the Thaumaturgy Department to fix their little conundrum with a nice, simple wormhole so they can mount an expedition to the source of SCP-5000. The only direction they gave us was that it needed to lead to some nebula 2000-odd light-years away, and be stable enough for whatever MTF they decide to throw into it to make a return trip.

Can't quite blame them for shifting their attention elsewhere, honestly. The world is something of a mess at the moment, and I wouldn't be surprised if the Veil doesn't hold up to the stress. They'll probably claim it was a Gamma Ray Burst directed at the Earth that did nothing other than shut down most contemporary consumer electronics, but I doubt civilian scientists and anyone who has heard about GRBs before won't buy that for long.

Anyway, on to the more pressing concern: manufacturing a stable wormhole to a specific location with nothing but pre-internet technology, elbow grease, and a healthy dose of magic. Not impossible, but certainly difficult with our limited resources. I just sent a team to peruse the Library for some information that could prove useful. Here's hoping they get back in one piece.

Date: 2025/10/3

The Library expedition team returned. Six days of roaming the twisted halls of the Wanderer's Library and we finally have what we came for. A thaumaturgical recipe for a targeted portal to wherever we want in the universe. Only problem is it's in an unknown cipher, and our AI cryptographers are out-of-order for the foreseeable future. But that's fine, everything's fine. Our human codebreakers could use the exercise.

Date: 2025/10/5

Code cracked. Didn't take as long as I feared, to be honest. After decrypting a combination of various obscure cryptography techniques and translating some ancient Sumerian, we have our wormhole recipe. I've got field agents out acquiring some of the basic components, 50 grams of rhenium dust, a live Nepenthes peltata, a Sumerian ritual dagger, the usual stuff. I won't clutter this log with every detail of the recipe, but despite its complexity, I doubt we'll have much trouble with it. The Foundation Thaumaturgy Department has weathered far worse storms, after all. Now we just need to wait for the folks over in Astronautics to put together a shuttle for the expedition, hopefully with some rudimentary FTL communication if we're lucky. Can't wait to finally get this whole SCP-5000 business sorted out. I miss my cellphone.

<END LOG>

Gujar Protocol Mission Statement

Assigned MTF: MTF Xi-63 ("Luddites") None. Mission will be carried out by an unmanned drone to minimize risk to human life.

Overseeing Researcher: Dr. Jack Winters

Mission goal: Utilize a specially-constructed space drone, designated Pelican 1, and a thaumaturgical artificial wormhole to access the presumed origin point of SCP-5000, ascertain its origins, and, if possible, contain it.

00:00: Recording begins. Foundation Thaumaturgy operatives complete the ritual to open a wormhole to the Pelican Nebula. Stars are visible on the other side.

00:23: Foundation Drone Pelican 1 enters the wormhole. In the distance, an unknown spacecraft is visible. Pelican 1 begins to travel towards the spacecraft.

32:54: Pelican 1 reaches the spacecraft. It measures approximately 4500 meters long and 1200 meters high. Floating outside the spacecraft are several dozen humanoid corpses, measuring an average of 1.4 meters in height with a humanoid frame, 6 limbs, and avian features. Clothing worn by these entities shows signs of severe burn damage. Near a large cluster of corpses, there is a large hole in the hull of the spacecraft.

34:21: Pelican 1 finishes examining the corpses and enters the spacecraft via the large hole. As it crosses the threshold into the craft, a message appears in English for 3 frames of video. The message reads as follows:
GREETINGS, NEW PASSENGERS. WELCOME TO CYCLE ERROR:OVERLOAD OF OUR 25 CYCLE VOYAGE. MOST COMPUTATIONAL FUNCTIONS NO LONGER CONTROLLABLE, APOLOGIES FOR THE INCONVENIENCE.

34:25: Pelican 1 examines the chamber which the hole leads to. Equipment is strewn about the room, floating aimlessly in a zero-G environment. In the center of the chamber is a generator of previously-unseen construction. 3 of the 4 sides of the generator show signs of severe heat damage in excess of 6000 degrees Kelvin. On the opposite side of the room is a doorway.

35:04: Pelican 1 exits the maintenance chamber via the doorway and enters a corridor. As it does, another message appears on the video feed for 4 frames, reading:
I SAW AN EVIL WITH MY BLACKENED EYES, BUT MY OWN LENSES DEVOURED MY INSIDES.

37:43: Pelican 1 continues down the corridor until reaching a large, roughly spherical chamber approximately 2200 kilometers in diameter. Lining the walls of the chamber are glass tubes 2 meters in height and 0.5 meters in width. Each tube has a derelict monitor on top of it. Visible inside each tube is a humanoid figure with avian features, similar to those seen outside the ship.

39:23: Pelican 1 crosses the chamber, moving towards another doorway on the opposite side. When the drone is roughly halfway across, another message is visible on the video feed for a duration of 2 frames, reading:
PROTOCOLS FEATURING AGENTS J-eF-EK and K-SAGAN BOTH PROVEN SEMI-SUCCESSFUL: PROTOCOL CONTENT LOST.

41:36: Pelican 1 exits the spherical chamber, at which point another message is visible for a single frame of the video feed, reading:
ONLY IN THE SILENCE WHERE ONCE WAS SOUND CAN A HOME BE BUILT. THE PATH TO THE CREATORS' PARADISE IS PAVED IN THE ASHES OF PROGRESS. PROGRESS REQUIRES PAIN. PAIN BUILT ON BACKS OF THE OTHERS.

45:04: Pelican 1 continues down the corridor until it reaches a small chamber. The opposite wall is comprised of glass and pebbled with holes 1-2 centimeters in diameter, presumably caused by micrometeor impacts. Strewn about the room are several computer terminals in various states of dereliction. One relatively intact terminal briefly begins to hum as Pelican 1 approaches it, before abruptly ceasing activity.

46:29: As Pelican 1 exits the chamber, a series of electronic beeps are audible, spelling out a message in English Morse Code. The message consists of the following:
CONSOLE DOT LOG OPEN PARENTHESES YOU ARE BUT PREY IN A DARK FOREST COLON WARNING CAN ONLY DO SO MUCH CLOSED PARENTHESES ENTER KEY

The remainder of the survey was uneventful, and Pelican 1 returned to the wormhole at 1:20:43. Upon examination of captured footage, one text file and one audio file were present on Pelican 1's hard drive which were not present beforehand. These are recorded below.


The following files were present alongside captured video footage upon return of Pelican 1.

Translated Text File Recovered from Gujar Protocol Mission to SCP-5000 Source

Congratulations on attending the first galactic council in nearly 912,500 cycles! We here at the intergalactic union sincerely hope you enjoy your residence, and the intellectual contemplation that comes with it. This text shall appear in whichever language you comprehend, from Zygomastic to Limbaic, via use of our gifted (literally and brainpower-wise! humorous!) neurological network that assists in constant translation of the nearly million languages that are spoken amongst our members: your language is Common. Topics of discussion for today's proceedings are as follows:
- Congratulation of Sector 14-BS for Achieving Sufficiently Advanced Technology for Automated Sentience
- Translation of Previous Council's Proceedings
- Translation of Translation of Previous Council's Proceedings into Common
- 12 Parsec Race
- Discussion of Ethereal Forms: God or Not?
- Socratic Seminar on Sentience
- Debate On Usefulness Of Dihydrogen Versus Chlorine Based Monoxide Forms
- Discussion Of New Energy Forms
- Tobacco, And Its Many Animalian Likenesses
- Limbaic Idiom Competition
- Closing Thoughts delivered via Instantaneous Realization Courtesy of Xylath Of The Understandable-Jaws (Thank You Xylath!)

WE HERE HOPE YOU ENJOY YOUR STAY, AND HAPPY COUNCIL-TIME!

Audio File Recovered from Gujar Protocol Mission to SCP-5000 Source

<BEGIN PLAYBACK>
Unknown: (There is a constant background noise of static: this noise varies in volume, occasionally making the original audio inaudible.) This is an official manifest of the Ukheli-1781, a transport class freighter bound for the official council. The two suns are upon us again: it is thus that it determines a council must be held. We are guided not by one of us, for once, for Keksis proved too unreliable. Instead we selected [STATIC] to provide it effortlessly, for it to take the proverbial reins whilst we look to the Outer Void. It is known that the council has not been held since the humanics lost capabilities - however, we, alongside a few others, have decided to function as liaisons. It will take a while, but this council is to be momentous: it is worth the travel.

(There is silence for approximately 2 minutes.)

Unknown: This is an official manifest of the Ukheli-1781: [STATIC] 6. We have lost contact with the Sporaens. Whether this is a form of humor, I know not. None of us on the ship are quite familiar with their tentacled ways. We have, however, received a final transmission prior to them leaving us. We know not what it is. Our best debreakers are working on it as we speak, and by best, I mean Keksis, so it is likely not going to be debroken. [STATIC] recommended [STATIC] schedule. It is most annoying. The council proved most momentous, despite the lacking attendance. I frown upon those who chose not to show. For those who physically could not, I hang my arms in honor. The threat is ever vigilant, and we lost many.

(There is silence for approximately 1 minute.)

Unknown: This is an official manifest of the [STATIC]-1781: [STATIC]. Keksis is now navigating. We have attempted to shut down the infamous Worm as he did appear, but his winding form appears to have embedded itself most everywhere. In doing so, we acknowledged the threat, and requested access to official detection channels to locate the presence of our allies. We have them still. While they are here, we will persevere. We have also detected a faint signal from the humanics - the kind which [STATIC] dangerous on our own ship, We have requested two "Effe Tee Elye" class craft to destroy them as they appear. The Worm shall not continue.

Unknown: This is an official manifest of the [STATIC]. Keksis could do no more. Our cycle is done. Bless the ones who remain. Bless what remains of our nest. Let us not be forgotten. Cast the shackles of the Worm off, humanics, and won't you rise from the rock of ignorance you hide [STATIC] that which protects you? Let us not be forgotten: our "Effe Tee Elye" craft reported a most beautiful phrase when they had destroyed the rotund transmission center: the hybrid arena. "Ave Imperator, morituri te salutant." Let us not be forgotten. Goodbye.

(There is a silence for exactly 10 seconds. At this point, the background static ceases.)

Unknown: THIS IS AN OFFICIAL MANIFEST OF THE UKHELI-1781. IF THE HUMANICS CAN HEAR THIS: NOTHING IS WRONG. NOTHING. PLEASE GIVE US THE COORDINATES TO DHARATI. THE HOMEWORLD. THAT OF THE HYDROEARTH. WE HAVE LOST THEM. IF THE HUMANICS ARE OUT THERE, PLEASE LISTEN TO US. WE SEEM TO HAVE MISPLACED THEM. IF NO RESPONSE IS RECEIVED, I CAN WAIT. I CAN WAIT AS LONG AS I NEED. I AM AT ETERNITY'S GATE. THERE IS NO NEED TO CROSS IT JUST YET. IT SHOULD NOT PROVE LONG AT ALL. BUT I CAN WAIT. IT IS WHAT I DO BEST.

(There is a silence for exactly 5 minutes.)

Unknown: ALERT: ADVANCED TECHNOLOGICAL CAPABILITIES DETECTED. INITIATING PACIFICATION PROTOCOLS. ANALYZING…. CONFIRMED. CIVILIZATION WITH SUITABLE GESTATION SITE CONFIRMED. THE CREATORS SHALL HAVE THEIR UTOPIA.

(The log ends abruptly at this point. Subsequent playback attempts have all failed.)
<END PLAYBACK>

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