fileserv:/explore/5170://audio/transc
Involved: MTF Tau-55 ("I Want To See The Manager")
Foreword: As part of investigations into Starhub Corporation, MTF Tau-55 was dispatched to the main headquarters on Ubi Avenue, Singapore, during operating hours under the guise of potential investors.
One: Mic check.
Two: Check.
Three: Check.
Four: Checkered.
Two: What the f- can you stop saying that, mate?
Four: I like checkered clothes. Can't stop me.
Two: That's not the- (sigh) All mics hot.
Command: Copy that, Tau-55. Proceed to the entrance.
One: Roger.
(Tau-55 enters the building. A reception desk is present, with two staff members, one female, and one male, standing behind it. They continue to grin.)
Woman: Welcome to Starhub! What can we do for you?
One: Uh… We are here after arranging a meeting with Mr. Peter.
Woman: Hmm. (The female employee picks up the telephone receiver and dials several digits, before waiting.)
Two: (whisper) Are they calling security?
One: (whisper) Negative. Do not engage.
Woman: Ah, yes, Mr. Secretary? A few individuals are here to see Mr. Peter. (A pause.) Mmhmm. (Pause.) May I ask of your purpose of visit? Just to confirm, of course.
Two: We, uh, would like to discuss future investment plans.
(The female employee stares at Two.)
Two: (whisper) I don't like her stare. At all.
(The female employee hangs up.)
Woman: Thank you, sir. Mr. Peter should be available now.
One: Good to hear. Thank you.
(The male employee picks up another telephone receiver and dials in several digits before waiting.)
Man: Ah, yes, Mujesh. Could you kindly escort our valued investors to Mr. Peter? (A pause.) Mmhmm. (Pause.) I see, I see. (Pause.) Alrighty.
(The male employee hangs up.)
Man: Mujesh shall be with you shortly to escort you. Please wait here.
(Both employees continue to grin at Tau-55.)
Four: (whisper) Are they just going to stand there and stare at us?
Unknown: Hello. I am Mujesh.
(The individual shakes hands with One.)
One: It is a pleasure to meet you, Mr. Mujesh.
(Four squints at the individual named "Mujesh".)
Four: (whisper) Isn't- isn't he… 5170-1?
Two: (whisper) Bollocks.
Three: (whisper) Just smile and greet, boys. Just smile and greet.
SCP-5170-1: Let's go. Shall we?
One: Yes. Let's.
(SCP-5170-1 guides Tau-55 through a long corridor fitted with observation mirrors. In the first room, a male staff member, identical to SCP-5170-1, is pointing out various illustrations on a whiteboard, similar to the one seen in Incident 5170.3, while several employees identical to SCP-5170-1 are seated around the whiteboard.)
Three: (whisper) T- they're the same guy.
Two: What are they doing, if I may ask?
SCP-5170-1: Ah, our valued Mr. Mujesh is giving a very detailed explanation on the objectives of our smart targeting campaign! And that is to-
Two: (whisper) Remove the competition.
SCP-5170-1: -remove the competition.
Two: (whisper) Oooh boy.
SCP-5170-1: Moving on!
(The group walks further down the corridor. They pass by the second room. Several gunshots are heard from this room.)
Two: Uh…
(Several instances identical to SCP-5170-1 are seen to be separated by cubicles, where each instance has a pair of earphones on, and firing several rounds from a Walther PPK pistol into the affixed target.)
One: It- it's… a… target practice room. How did your company manage to get approval for this?
SCP-5170-1: Eh, we did some… deals here and there. (chuckle)
(A bullet ricochets off the observation mirror.)
Three: That is… certainly unsafe.
(SCP-5170-1 grins and motions for them to continue walking.)
Four: (whisper) That's it, I'm gonna take some pictures with me.
(Four pauses to take out his mobile phone and takes a picture of the room. An audible sound of a flash going off is heard. SCP-5170-1 turns around.)
SCP-5170-1: Is there something bothering you, sir?
Four: No, everything is fine, thank you.
(SCP-5170-1 glances at Four's hand, now hidden from view, behind his back. SCP-5170-1 grins, and gestures for them to continue.)
Two: (whisper) Fuck sake, mate! Why is your flash on?
Four: (mutter) I don't know, I don't know.
(The group passes by another room. This room is empty, while a single whiteboard is situated at the middle.)
One: Uh, what is… this for, if I may ask?
SCP-5170-1: Oh! That's for practising how to reach our target audience! Can't have them getting lost on who to visit, yes?
Two: Uh… so… they teleport?
SCP-5170-1: Yes.
(Two begins to reach for his communicator.)
SCP-5170-1: No worries, sirs! They're just out for lunch at Subway.
Two: (whisper) …never mind.
Three: (whisper) We're gonna have to talk to Subway about this.
SCP-5170-1: Moving on!
(The group reaches an elevator. SCP-5170-1 presses an arrow pointing upwards. After two minutes, the elevator arrives.)
Two: (whisper) Fuck, fuck, fuck, fu- ow! Careful when squeezing in, mate!
Three: (whisper) Sorry.
SCP-5170-1: I apologize about the lack of space, sirs. We're trying to get more funds on improving our elevators.
(SCP-5170-1 proceeds to press the button labeled '30'. The elevator doors close. Silence is maintained for approximately two minutes, until a sharp 'blarp' could be heard.)
Two: (whisper) No.
Four: (whisper) Wasn't me.
Command: We heard that.
Three: (whisper) Just fucking kill me-
(REDACTED FOR BREVITY)
(The elevator reaches the 30th floor, and a ding is heard. The doors open. Two white doors are situated in front of the elevator, with the plaque inscribed with "Mr. Peter Kaliaropoulos".)
SCP-5170-1: Alright, this is the CEO's room! Have fun!
One: Thank you, mister…
(One looks around. SCP-5170-1 is nowhere to be seen.)
One: Okay. Perfectly fine.
(SCP-5170-1 re-manifests.)
SCP-5170-1: Just a heads up, if you wish. Remember to always knock first! Bye bye!
Two: Holy f-
(SCP-5170-1 demanifests.)
Two: I'm gonna need to be admitted into the fucking medical bay with how this bugger keeps popping out like a fucking magician.
One: Command, entering the CEO's room.
Command: Copy. Proceed.
(Before turning the doorknob, One hesitates, and knocks three times, before turning the doorknob.)
One: Mr. Peter Karliaropoulos.
(For convenience sake, Mr. Peter Karliaropoulos will be henceforth, designated as PoI-320.)
PoI-320: Ah. Just Peter will do.
(PoI-320 shakes hands with each member of Tau-55.)
PoI-320: Please, do take a seat.
One: Thank you.
(Each take their seat.)
PoI-320: Now, we can begin. Oh, and before that, how was the… uh, guide? Good? Bad? So-so?
Two: Exceptional.
PoI-320: Good, good. Now, what is it you're here for?
Two: We are… interested, in working with you, Mr. Peter.
PoI-320: Ah, excellent!
Two: However, we are responsible adults, so we would like to go through your operation ethics. We have an issue with one of your… employees.
PoI-320: And that is?
One: Uh… Mr. Mujesh.
(PoI-320 frowns, and squints.)
PoI-320: Which one?
One: Uh…
PoI-320: Ah, it's fine. I shall clear some things up with him after the war.
Four: The war?
PoI-320: Yes. The war between the telecom companies. The Big Market Gobble. Never heard of it?
Four: No, we have not.
PoI-320: Ah, that's fine.
(PoI-320 clears his throat.)
PoI-320: For decades, our sales have been dropping, only due to those fools in M1 and Singtel trying to take my share. Well, with our smart targeting campaign, this will be no more.
One: Okay… so, you want to take out this competition… by taking out potential employees.
PoI-320: Exactly.
One: This "Mr. Mujesh". Is he… cloned?
PoI-320: Mmm. Just like what ol' KFC is, Starhub has some…
(PoI-320 gestures dramatically, suddenly spreading out his arms in an outwards sweeping fashion. His voice is now deeper, raspier tone.)
PoI-320: Secret recipes.
One: How about your employees possessing firearms? People could get hurt.
(PoI-320's voice normalizes.)
PoI-320: Well… we did pull some strings. (chuckle) I mean, doesn't every company do this to survive?
(PoI-320 chuckles.)
PoI-320: And don't worry about the people. They'll be fine. Besides, it should have a 99.98% chance of hitting the right guy. I mean, (shrugs) we should at least hit some rival employees hidden amongst the target audience. They're basically wolves in sheep's clothing, you know?
One: Okay… The 0.02%?
PoI-320: Well, uh, take that up to McDonald's. Sacrificing a few wouldn't hurt much for some profit. (chuckle)
(A telephone receiver rings on PoI-320's phone.)
PoI-320: Yes, yes. (Pause.) Yes.
(PoI-320 hangs up.)
PoI-320: I'm sorry, gentlemen, looks like I don't have much time. We could, uh, complete the contract after this meeting, yes?
(Several instances of SCP-5170-1 enter the room, holding clipboards, whiteboards and laptops. Multiple diagrams and layouts of what appears to be the several residential areas can be seen.)
PoI-320: This is war, fellas. We will win this war and take back our market share! Oh, and yes, I shall let Mr. Mujesh escort you out. Good day!
One: Good day, Mr. Peter.
Two: (whisper) What the fuck are Subway and McDonald's up to?
[End log]
Containment procedures for SCP-5170-1 are being debated. Investigations into Subway IP Inc's and McDonald's Corporation's involvement in events related to SCP-5170 are ongoing.