The Offsite
rating: +1+x

Item #: SCP-5838-J

Object Class: Keter

Containment Procedures: Due to its widespread effects within popular websites and social media platforms1, containment of SCP-5838-J has been deemed impossible. Foundation webcrawler I/O-3475 ("Creepy Pasta") has been tasked with continually monitoring online communities that contain frequent usage of key-phrases such as "anomaly," "lizard," or "statue," for indications of overly obsessive tendencies or online posts that are susceptible to SCP-5838-J's memetic and infohazardous influence.

If any of the aforementioned is discovered and can be traced back to SCP-5838-J, I/O-3475 are to remove these postings and flag the users' responsible. Flagged users are to be recovered, interrogated, amnesticized, and reinserted into the general public by MTF-Chi-11 ("Online Moderators") as soon as possible. If SCP-5838-J's effect extends beyond MTF-Chi-11's ability to maintain, embedded Foundation internet administrators are responsible for mitigating the anomaly's effects through isolating and moderating the communities that hosted the original posts.

Description: SCP-5838-J is a memetic and infohazardous phenomenon that manifests within popular creepypasta and collaborative online fiction fan-sites or communities, often characterized by obsessive tendencies towards particular media or literature retrieved from other platforms. Users affected by SCP-5838-J will attempt to spread its influence through sharing popular media and literature consistently hosted on these fan-made communities with other users.

Although the underlying cause of SCP-5838-J remains unknown, analysis of effected users and their posts determined that a majority share the following characteristic's:

  • All users appear to be under the age of 14.
  • Posts contain multiple grammatical mistakes, consistent with online jargon or acronyms.
  • Posts contain the same series of content and are not known to deviate. Affected content includes SCP-5838-J-A through SCP-5838-J-I, all of which appear to be non-anomalous works and literature that originated nearly 10 years ago.2 Literature was originally hosted on, but has since been removed and copied onto multiple websites.
  • All users appear to be negative towards other members who attempt to deviate from posts relating to SCP-5838-J-A through SCP-5838-J-I. Additionally, attempts to show affected users newer works and literature from similar platforms have been repeatedly unsuccessful, with users often citing that these are "too long" or "too complicated" for them to comprehend. Refer to Figure 5838-J.1 for further examples.

SCP-5838-J does not appear to de-manifest once it has affected users, and subsequent mass amnesticization would be required to effectively contain the anomaly. Because of this, Foundation personnel have decided that appropriate monitoring of these users and their communities is a sufficient alternative. Information has since been outdated, review Update 5838-J.1 for more information.

Figure 5838-J.A-D: The following screen captures were retrieved from Twitter, Reddit, Tumblr, and Discord. Please note the similarities between each subsequent post as they correlate to SCP-5838-J's effects on online users:

Johnathon Moore @EmptyHoleHere

imagine reading 50000+ words just to feel scared lol. all this newer stuff is crap. The hell is a Sarkic? Can I sarkic you in your ass?

  • LIKES 12

24 December 2020 - Bend, Oregon

[–] Jakkyboi 1700 points 1 day ago

why does everyone keep telling me to "lOoK aT tHe NeWeR sTuFf"? legit i can't even read any of them. they don't encapsulate what it means to be scary or good. I didn't go to the site to see romance you fucking nerds.



reject modernity, embrace PEANUT you goddamn S C R U B S

384 notes

Today at 4:26 PM
I consider anything past Series 1 to be "fan-made" and not apart of the actual universe.

Update 5838.1: On 01/07/2021, Foundation webcrawler I/O-3475 logged an inconsistency in regards to a Reddit post that abnormally deviated from regular online engagements and SCP-5838-J instances. This post, while inconclusive, indicated that SCP-5838-J could theoretically de-manifest naturally through either self-awareness or extended lengths of time. Research pending as to whether or not this can be replicated and subsequently applied to SCP-5838-J for further containment or if this is implausible due to SCP-5838-J's major influence on thousands of users. The post and a single response has since been added to this documentation for future reference:

About the Statue, The Lizard, The Blob, and The Shy Guy…
submitted 3 hours ago by Dysadont

You know something? I've been lingering around in these communities for a while and like, everyone seems to constantly go on about the same 4 or 5 articles. But like… there are so many other things on the wiki, y'know? I mean like, what about that one about forrest gump or about the bears? there's just… better stuff, and maybe we're all focusing in on articles that are just… bad?

11 comments share save hide give gold report crosspost


[–] NotACrow 3800 points 2 hours ago

fuck you

The post was subsequently deleted after 4 hours.

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