If you're reading this, Chappell as you know him is dead.

Marco Bellone. One of the Fifth Priests, and our direct line to the Lunatics.

Anywhere you can spot a "Fifth Church." Big, tall buildings, with a five pointed symbol like an asterisk. They're all over the states, but the important one's around [location] next to the bookstore. Naturally, the address with all the 5s.

If you have to go to one of the churches, for any reason, never stay long. Never listen to the preachers for anything longer than five minutes. Never look the Lunatics in the eyes, and if you ever start hearing a faint crackling noise, like an old bonfire from somewhere far away, it's too late for you.

As for the church itself, damn near everyone. Everyone who's ever walked down 5th Avenue and spotted "The First Fifth Church of Manhattan." Not a very popular joint, but visible for damn sure.

As for the razzle-dazzle however, that's down to us, the Cheesers², and a couple of special folks, the Lunatics. Keep them in line, but don't rough 'em up too bad.

With great difficulty.

The Fifth Churches don't look like they got any sort of magic to them, and we suspect that's by design. Looks like a place to shuffle in, worship the Lord, and feel good about yourself like all the good little Christians do. But that's not the gig here, not remotely. Peer through the cracks and you get an idea of what the Fifth Church is really like; a cult of madmen, almost like spacemen. The deeper you go the more fucked up it gets, and once you're in too deep you'll come to find you're no longer human. These are the Lunatics.

None of this draws any sort of attention, despite what they're capable of. Mass murder. Suicide pacts. Suspiciously popular music. Nobody notices, and that's one of their quirks. They got the same memory magic we used to have, and on a hell of a bigger scale too. Even the Cheesers hardly have any idea what the Lunatics get up to.

We only found out about them once they tried to bring the whole damn Spirit into their schemes. Turns out they had an inside man for a while. Not an inside man in the way you'd expect, no gathering evidence or anything like that. All he did was try and spread the word, the little tics that make the Lunatics, well, lunatics; some sort of disease of the mind. We put a stop to that real quick.

Things got real dicey at that point. Now Chappell never liked the Christian church. The church wasn't a fan of witchcraft, drugs, murder, or anything that could cut Chappell a check. But while he was in business, there wasn't nothing the church could do to stop him. Problem was, when the Spirit drew the Fifthists' ire, they weren't afraid to get their hands dirty. The Fifth Church hurled a modern day crusade at us, and to stop it we either had to take them down or get on better terms.

Chappell's first idea was what always worked best: diplomacy, Chicago Style. But there's a strange thing about the Lunatics. Though the church is their strongest presence, there's always another way they can get you. Fifthism ain't just a religion, it's something deeper. If you're against it, it can get you any way it needs. Squirrel attacks, ex-cons, violent jazz bassists. Eventually the attacks progressed to battles you can't fight with guns. So we decided to get talkin'.

Stephanie St. Clair. The Queen of Numbers and a behind-closed-doors Lunatic.

Lucky for us, we didn't have to start with the Fifth Church. Would've been a little awkward to come crawling back to them, after all. St. Clair, the Harlem queen of gambling, turned out to be in cahoots with the Lunatics herself. Needless to say, it was in Chappell's best interests to strike a deal with Queenie. If he was right, the Fifth Church would warm up to him in time.

Queenie spilled the beans on a whole lot in the little chat that ensued. Said that the Five Families were destined for transcendence, or some shit. Claimed that she needed to bust up her husband Hamid, bring him closer to the Fifth World, but the Archons wanted to keep him alive. Once all that was said and done, Chappell was able to get her to a business deal of sorts. A stake in the numbers racket³ at Harlem. Wouldn't you know it, Chappell was right on the money, and the Fifth Church got a whole lot more interested in the Spirit's dealings.

The Fifth Church carries out a great deal of violence, extortion, and theft for their strange ends, and all the cash they make with it they waste on the most bizzare things possible. One of ours, on the night of May 5th, swears on his life he witnessed a group of Fifth Priests, just tossing money and furniture into a bonfire. Later he talked with Marco Bellone, the Fifth Priest we're in leagues with, and asked why. Marco claimed they "were in debt to the Archons."

Convenient for us that they don't care about the cash. So long as we help them out, knocking targets off and burning shit down, we're on their payroll. And it's a generous one, to say the least. Marco tells us what to do and we do it, within reason. Usually it's a simple hit or arson, but sometimes we gotta do weirder stuff. Sell some books, chart out constellations, sometimes we just have to play a radio signal out in public. Don't ask questions. More importantly, never listen to the radio. We don't know what's on it, but their membership grows every time we play it. Invest in some ear plugs.