Wish Fullfillment
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Item #: SCP-2347

Object Class: Safe

Special Containment Procedures: SCP-2347 is contained in a Type S Standard Humanoid Anomaly Containment Cell with standard accommodations. SCP-2347 requires normal human rations on a daily basis, and is on a daily antidepressant regimen. Additionally, monthly meetings with the Site-17 humanoid anomaly psychologist and Site-17 veterinarian are scheduled in order to maintain SCP-2347's mental and physical health.

SCP-2347 is currently classified as Type C sapient anomaly and is granted limited literary, audiovisual, and social privileges that may be revoked at any time.

Description: Genetically, SCP-2347 is identical to the Alaskan Malamute breed of the domestic dog, canis lupus familiaris. However, its skeleton and anatomy is largely humanoid. Humanoid features include

  • An enlarged cranium capable of supporting a brain approximately the same size as an average human's.
  • In place of forepaws, it has fully dexterous hands with opposable thumbs. Claws are still present in place of fingernails.
  • A variety of skeletal structures found in humans that allows SCP-2347 bipedal movement.
  • A larynx capable of producing vocalizations on par with a non-anomalous human.

SCP-2347 is 85 kilograms in mass and 1.8 meters tall.

SCP-2347 is sapient and capable of speech. It claims to be P██████ L████, a Silver City, New Mexico man who has not been seen since the day before SCP-2347's recovery. SCP-2347 demonstrates intimate and accurate knowledge of P██████ L████'s personal life and behavior.

Recovery: On October 13, 2006 at 0413 local time, an entity (either P██████ L████, or, more likely, SCP-2347) called 911 requesting an ambulance. Content of the phone call activated automatic monitoring systems. At approximately 0429 local time, the automatic monitoring systems detected keywords in the radio traffic between the ambulance and Silver City central dispatch that resulted in Foundation operatives being deployed to recover SCP-2347, administer amnestics to the affected civilians, and recover the radio and phone recordings from Silver City central dispatch. A cover story involving P██████ L████'s suicide was later disbursed.

Initial interview log:

Interviewed: SCP-2347
Interviewing: Dr. Friedrich (Site-17 humanoid anomaly psychologist)
Forward: Interview was conducted immediately after SCP-2347 was recovered and moved to Site-17. No information had yet been recovered regarding SCP-2347's origin. SCP-2347 was separated from Dr. Friedrich by a Plexiglas partition.

SCP-2347: Can someone please tell me where the hell I am?!

Dr. Friedrich: I'm afraid it's classified. My name is Doctor Friedrich and —

SCP-2347: I don't give a fuck who you are! I want to know where I am! I know my rights!

Dr. Friedrich: Please calm down. You're in a secure government facility. We have to keep you quarantined until we know more about your condition, and, in order for that to happen, we need to ask a few questions. Do you understand that?

SCP-2347: Ok, fine, yeah, whatever.

Dr. Friedrich: Can you state your name, for the record?

SCP-2347: P██████ L████.

Dr. Friedrich: Okay. Now, do you have any idea why this might have happened?

SCP-2347: No. I don't have a clue. This sort of thing only happens in — It only happens in fiction, ok?

Dr. Friedrich: You don't sound so sure. I need to know everything I can so we can do what we can to cure you. And you can trust me. I'm a certified physician and an experienced psychologist.

SCP-2347: Look, please don't judge me, all right?

Dr. Friedrich: I'm a professional, you don't need to be worried.

SCP-2347: Ok. I've never told anyone about this. Not my parents, none of my exes, no one.[Subject inhales deeply.] I'm a furry. I like animals and stuff. It's a fetish of mine. I browse weird comics and shit on furaffinity.net and Deviant Art and stuff. It gets me off. But this sort of crap doesn't just happen!

Dr. Friedrich: I see. Have you been made strange offers fairly recently, online or otherwise?

SCP-2347: What? No, nothing like that. Except…

Dr. Friedrich: Except?

SCP-2347: Last night, when I fell asleep, I had a really strange dream. I looked just like the avatar I use on all the accounts I have on furry websites, except… real, you know? Like, actual fur and everything. Kinda like this, actually. Anyway, in the dream, I'm walking around in a great big field. All the colors seem off, like I was colorblind, like a dog. Actually, they still seem off. Doc, am I gonna be colorblind?

Dr. Friedrich: I don't know. We won't know everything for a while, but I'll be sure to let you know. Can you please continue the story?

SCP-2347: Okay, okay, I'm sorry. Anyway, I was walking around in a big field covered in fresh grass, and I could smell and feel everything and it was incredible, when this big guy with a turban walks up to me and says, "You really want to be a dog person, don't you?" And I said, "Yeah, but that'll never happen." Then he said, "Never say never," and walked away. And I woke up right after that because it felt too hot, and I saw what happened, so I called 911.

Dr. Friedrich: And that's it?

SCP-2347: I'm not sure, but I could've sworn I heard the big guy with the turban mumble the word "loser" as he walked off.

Dr. Friedrich: Thank you very much, P██████. I think that should be it for this interview.

SCP-2347: No, doc, wait. Please. Please tell me you'll do everything you can to fix this. [Subject gestures towards self.] I can't live like this. I have a dog, a normal dog, that I have to take care of. I've got — I've got friends and family and a job and everything. I mean, do you know how much this hair itches? It feels like my face after I've gone a while without shaving, but all over. And it's too hot, and I smell like shit and I can smell everything now and — fuck, man. I'd take any shitty day working for my shithead dad's plumbing company over five more minutes of this. Hell, I'd take a lifetime of that over this crap. I have a tail — What the fuck am I gonna do with a tail? I can't even control it! Please doc, you have to help me.

Dr. Friedrich: We'll do everything we can.

Closing Statement: No further information regarding SCP-2347's origin has been found to date.

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