SCP-682 shortly after getting its lunch money stolen.
Item #: SCP-682
Object Class: Keter
Special Containment Procedures: SCP-682 must be bullied as soon as possible. At this time, full bullying of SCP-682 is not possible. SCP-682 should be constantly swirlied at all times by at least two personnel with level 5 BRO clearance. If 682 should escape, all teams available should converge on its location for immediate wedgieing.
Personnel are forbidden to speak to SCP-682, for fear of becoming a total fucking nerd. All personnel attempting to talk to SCP-682 should are subject to immediate noogieing.
Description: SCP-682 is a large nerd, of unclear origin. Sarah says he's just from New Jersey, but come on, no one looks that ugly. SCP-682 has shown a hatred of all life, probably because it can't get laid.