Ask not what you can do for your country. Ask what’s for lunch.
rating: +3+x
3/XXXX LEVEL 3/XXXX
CLASSIFIED
classified-lv3.svg
Item #: SCP-XXXX
Keter


Taco_Bell_Headquarters_Irvine2.png

An instance of SCP-XXXX-1.

Special Containment Procedures: Curative and preventative responses to SCP-XXXX have comprehensively failed. Current Foundation efforts are coordinated towards the observation of infection patterns should an exploitable weakness manifest. Standard procedure for a Broken Masquerade Class Scenarios created by the SCP-XXXX pandemic is to amnesticize and evacuate civilians in the area.

Site-19 Site-55 maintains an electronic log of all SCP-XXXX-1 locations, updating as necessary when an SCP-XXXX-2 is created

Description: SCP-XXXX is an infectious phenomenon targetting architecture inhabited by or otherwise used by humans. Infections typically begin in restaurants, cafeterias, and other dining establishments (hereby referred to as SCP-XXXX-1) before spreading to the location's cash register, which will display messages saying 'Thank you for choosing Taco Bell'. The infected location's menu will expand to include items typical of an SCP-XXXX-2 location such as tacos, burritos, etc. Over the course of eight to thirteen months, the SCP-XXXX-1 location will undergo an autonomous structural reorganization to become similar in appearance to a standard SCP-XXXX-2 location.

SCP-XXXX-2 is the concept of the fast-food restaurant chain "Taco Bell".

History: SCP-XXXX's first host was a pizzeria in Downey, California, which lysed1 into an SCP-XXXX-2 instance on 05/03/1963. As the incident was originally believed to be a single, unexplained event taking place over months, no amnestics were administered. The restaurant was allowed to re-open due to the fact the owners and employees had lost all memory of the previous restaurant's existence and regarded SCP-XXXX-2 as being open since the beginning of the year.

SCP-XXXX continued to increase in virulence and host quantity without detection until 1967 whereupon 10 locally-owned restaurants were simultaneously infected, closing down and re-opening as SCP-XXXX-2 instances in a similar time frame

combination.jpg

An instance of SCP-XXXX-1, formerly a Kentucky Fried Chicken restaurant, or 'KFC'.

Once recognized as an anomalous epidemic, initial curative efforts involved exploiting pre-existing bureaucratic channels to prevent SCP-XXXX’s spread and potentially sterilize already-infected locations. Treatment efforts included, but were not limited to, lawsuits, rigged health inspections and ingredient recalls. None were effective. Competing restaurant chains Qdoba, Chipotle, and Moe's Southwest Grill were funded by Foundation front companies to compete with SCP-XXXX, but this strategy was rendered unreliable due to SCP-XXXX-2's constant mutations in the form of sales and special events.

Below is a table of dates and notable mutations and events regarding SCP-XXXX.


Addendum One — Abridged Log of Notable SCP-XXXX-2 Instances



Location Former Establishment Date Notes
Downey, California Unknown, local pizzeria. March 5th, 1963 First recorded infection of SCP-XXXX.
Downey, California Multiple restaurants. July 13th, 1967 Discovery of SCP-XXXX's infectious properties by the Foundation, all restaurants in Downey, CA were affected.
Austin, Texas Burger King, fast food chain. April 7th, 1972 First active attempt to halt SCP-XXXX-1 propagation.

Containment Attempt: Foundation assets were tactically deployed to the local court system to incite a closure of the instance after the introduction of rats and mold spores through the rooftop ventilation. Despite overwhelming evidence, no closure was made. Further investigation revealed that the local USFDA office employees had repeatedly visited the instance in the past six months.

Albuquerque, New Mexico Chili's/First New Mexico Bank March 4th, 1986 First cross-building manifestation. Three instances manifested next to each other over the course of two months, progressively disintegrated the walls separating each structure until all three hosts had merged into one SCP-XXXX-2 instance
Hoover, Alabama Walter 'n Co. Auto Repair Shop, automobile repair store. October 10th, 1992 First SCP-XXXX-1 instance entirely unassociated with food.
Mexico City, Mexico Applebee's, grill and bar chain. June 4th, 1993 The Mexican government incidentally became aware of SCP-XXXX, and attempted to force closure of the chain. This invariably caused all officials within the government to be unable to perceive SCP-XXXX; in addition, all documents of SCP-XXXX existing in Mexico were erased. Of note, SCP-XXXX has displayed increased infection rates in the country since this event.
Irvine, California Multiple businesses. February 2nd, 1994 Rapid conversion of a corporate building into an SCP-XXXX-1 instance. Individuals affected by SCP-XXXX at this location claimed to represent Taco Bell at various executive levels, with one individual claiming the title of CEO.

Following this conversion, the Foundation investigated all individuals claiming to be top-level officials of the corporation. All affected subjects were former employees of the various companies renting office space in the building, with little to no suspected anomalous activity or prior involvement with SCP-XXXX being noted.

Location Log cont.

Location Former Establishment Date Notes
Three Portlands Rocko's Rockin' Rocky Road, ice cream parlor November 18th, 1998 First instance of SCP-XXXX-1 appearing in an anomalous community.


Containment Attempt: Foundation resources attempted to coerce the FBIUIU to force a closure of instance, which was rejected. Further investigation noted several SCP-XXXX-2 instances located in close proximity to UIU headquarters in Washington D.C. The extent to which SCP-XXXX has affected Groups of Interest is unclear.


Munich, Germany Spicy Crust Pizzeria, Foundation front company. May 8th, 2000 First Foundation front company compromised.


Containment Attempt: Foundation agents deployed to incinerate instance. Despite succeeding, instance was rebuilt over the following six months and resumed operations.


- - July 26th, 2003 Ambrose Restaurants GoI ceases activity. All locations have been transformed to SCP-XXXX-2 instances.


Paris, France - April 1st, 2006 The city of Paris goes dark and is presumed lost.



Containment Attempt: A BM Broken Masquerade Scenario was declared through inner Foundation channels and a statement was prepared for the media. The complete quarantine of the city of Paris was established. Deemed failure after new SCP-XXXX-1 instance discovered 1 kilometer away in the town of Versailles.



Addendum Two- Exploration of Paris

On April 2nd, 2008, the Foundation launched an exploration into the city of Paris, France, which had become an instance of SCP-XXXX. MTF Eta-6 ("Door Dashers") were selected to infiltrate the location and attempt to recover any foodstuffs unaffected by SCP-XXXX.

<BEGIN LOG>

E6-Alpha: This is MTF Eta-6, we are entering Paris to gather foodstuffs.

Command: Acknowledged. Good luck boys. Hopefully there's more up there than those anoma-tacos.

E6-Alpha opens the manhole and climbs onto the street. E6-Beta and E6-Charlie follow, recovering the manhole behind them. The street is dark and empty. All of the buildings lining the road have Taco Bell logos bolted onto them at multiple locations. All SCP-XXXX instances appear to be open for business.

E6-Beta: [pointing to a nearby SCP-XXXX instance] Hey, is that an apartment?

E6-Alpha: Depends. Does it count if no one lives there and the whole lobby has been turned into a Taco Bell?

E6-Beta: We could see if there's anything left in a cabinet or a refrigerator.

Command: I'm going to have to stop you there Beta. We can't have you enter an SCP-XXXX instance at all. We don't know what causes this thing to spread. Maybe it's eating a taco, maybe it's even stepping inside. But we can't take the risk.

E6-Charlie: Well… that narrows our options.

Command: As I said, good luck.

E6-Alpha: We'll start a spiral search pattern. Keep your eyes peeled for any unaffected buildings.

E6-Beta: Or an outdoor garden?

E6-Alpha: Yeah, that'd work too.

MTF Eta-6 begin their search. After an hour they have surveyed approximately 5 km2 of the city without any success.

E6-Beta: Hey, have either of you guys actually seen anyone eating inside one of these places?

E6-Charlie: I mean, I had friends who used to love Taco Bell.

E6-Beta: No, I mean like here. Today.

E6-Charlie: I— I don't think I've seen any customers.

E6-Alpha: Me neither.

E6-Beta: [Walking toward an SCP-XXXX instance] Ok… good yeah. Just wanted to make sure I wasn't going crazy.

E6-Charlie: We're not allowed to go inside those things you know.

E6-Beta: I know, I know. I'm just looking.

E6-Alpha: You should get back. You might provoke them.

E6-Beta: I can't tell if they're looking at me or past me. Permission to continue observation?

E6-Alpha: [sighs] Command?

Command: Permission granted.

E6-Beta: [Approaching the SCP-XXXX instance] They're just standing there. Well, I guess some people in the back are making food but the cashiers aren't moving. I don't think they're blinking. They're so thin and pale.

E6-Charlie: Maybe they keep working through dinner.

E6-Beta: Maybe…

E6-Alpha: We should get moving. We're wasting our time.

E6-Beta: It's not like we've made any real progress…

E6-Charlie: What if we tried a bird's eye view? Any unaffected places should stick out like a sore thumb, right?

E6-Alpha: That's a good idea. Any ideas for vantage points?

E6-Charlie: Well… there's the obvious one.

E6-Alpha: Ah, of course. I don't think it's too far away from here.

MTF Eta-6 change course. After approximately thirty minutes of navigation, the search party arrives at the Eiffel Tower. They approach one of the feet of the tower, but stop before entering. Inside is a large seating area and surrounding a Taco Bell stand.

E6-Charlie: You have to be kidding me.

E6-Beta: Hey umm… guys? What time does Taco Bell usually close?

E6-Alpha: [reading the hours on the foot of the Eiffel Tower] It says here midnight.

E6-Beta: And that's in like, a few minutes right?

E6-Alpha: Command, does anything happen after midnight?

Command: Honestly… we don't know. We never sent any drones out at night since it's just more effective to deploy them during the day, and you're the first night search we've sent.

E6-Charlie: We should get back, shouldn't we?

MTF Eta-6 begin to run back to the incursion point. However, before they arrive SCP-XXXX employees begin exiting from SCP-XXXX instances. They fill the streets, making navigation difficult. However, they do not appear to acknowledge the Eta-6 members, nor display any activity beyond wandering and moaning. E6-Beta suddenly stops.

E6-Alpha: Beta, what are you doing?

E6-Beta: Shhh, can you hear it?

Eta-6 is silent. E6-Beta lowers himself, and places his microphone near the stomach of an SCP-XXXX Employee. A distinct rumbling noise is heard.

SCP-XXXX Employee: So… hungry.

E6-Beta stands.

E6-Beta: You're hungry?

E6-Charlie: Stop talking to them!

SCP-XXXX Employee: Can't eat… another.

E6-Beta: Another what?

Command: Beta, disengage from the anomaly. That's an order.

E6-Beta: Another taco?

All SCP-XXXX Employees turn to the Eta-6 members.

SCP-XXXX Employee: Have you tried our new Cool Ranch Dorito Taco Shell?

The SCP-XXXX Employees converge upon MTF Eta-6, knocking them to the ground. The following phrases could be identified in the audio: "One Dollar Double-Stacked Tacos", "Limited Time Only", "Medium drinks are only a dollar during happy hour!", "Of course we have queso!". Visual feeds from all Eta-6 members are lost. After three minutes, the shouting fades and is replaced with the moaning of SCP-XXXX Employees.

Command: Umm… Eta-6? Is anyone there?

No response.

Command: Hello?

E6-Beta: Hello! Welcome to Taco Bell. What would you like to order?

Command: … goddamn it.

<END LOG>

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